Story time

[catch22girl]

A new 24 fic. Pre-Day 1. Nina and Jack.

Title: A Long Way To Fall
Author: Catch22Girl
Fandom: 24
Summary: Pre-Day 1. Nina makes a move and forgets about the consequences.
Disclaimer: Characters not mine, belong to FOX and others.
Title from a song by Mary Gauthier - an amazing singer.

She should have asked permission to kiss him.

This thought only occurred to Nina later that night as she logged onto a private IRC network using a computer no one knew she had and an untraceable cell phone.

It was almost her nightly routine. Anyone looking in the window would nothing but a woman in scruffy pajama pants and an old CTU training t-shirt. In this setting, her computer screen was innocuous; no one would ever suspect that national security secrets were being transmitted instead of more salacious conversation.

They spoke in code. A complicated and convoluted code that she easily decoded now but at the start had almost forgotten several times. Lately, there wasn’t much news either way, the chat room was empty tonight, and she was getting restless. Three times a week, she would log on and wait for an hour. She had taken to hoping that the room remained empty.

It was down times like this, where she almost pretend this other side didn’t exist. Sometimes, weeks or even months went by without an assignment or request of information. During that time, she was just a CTU agent with no hidden agenda, performing her duties to the best of her ability.

Those were the mornings where she woke up and didn’t have to work to remember who she was, when she could almost look in the mirror without surprise at the minor plastic surgery alterations. On those days, she entered the office without fear of discovery and could take and give orders without hesitation. She knew nothing she did would work against her, or her employer’s, best interests and that made her feel almost comfortable.

Then, the assignment would come, and although she was very careful, she sometimes felt like everyone suspected her. Her maneuverings were almost unnoticeable. The only time she came close to being caught was when her employers wanted her to let a prisoner go.

“Hit me,” she remembered saying. “Hit me and run.” But the bastard didn’t stop at one swing and she woke up groggy and in pain some time later and almost started speaking in her second language. The hospital was unfamiliar and when a nurse came in and asked if she had any family to notify it was hard to remember their names.
After years, she was used to America, but sometimes she would feel a deep sadness when she caught a news story about her homeland or her real adopted country. She went out to see German films just to listen to the language but pretended to follow along with the subtitles.

Her longest relationship here, which was a year-long never ending struggle to keep him in the dark, ended when he accused her of having an affair.

“I’ve known you for over a year and you’re still pretty much a stranger. Where do you go at night? Who are you talking to in the morning? Who is he?”

And she could have denied it, but he was asking too many questions and it was easier to let him leave before he got hurt.

This, this was different. Stupid, but different. It wasn’t anything she had ever planned, but opportunity presented itself and she could not resist.

The offices were glass but only she and Jack were there that late at night.

It was hard to deny an instant attraction. But although she had few principles, he had many and even flirting with a woman was apparently high on that list.

As his next-in-command and right-hand woman, they spent the most time together. It was all innocent. He talked about his family most of the time and she forced herself to care. They ran operations together, stopped terrorist activities and he never noticed that sometimes she was working against him.

Out of all the things she’d prepared for, this was something far outside her radar. It happened in increments. One day, she noticed his eyes, then another day his voice, another his smile and then she couldn’t help from noticing everything.

That first dream caught her off-guard. Where he held her and talked to her in her native tongue and they were on the same side. But she mostly remembered the way it felt to be held.

She wondered if her employers knew.

Tonight when she walked into his office and told him to go home, he barely looked at her.

He wasn’t the type of man to talk about his problems but she could see them as an invisible weight.

It had been almost a month since she pretended to ignore a loud private conversation where she quickly surmised that he didn’t really have a home to go to anymore.

“I’m sorry about Teri, if you ever want to talk....”

“I should have seen it coming.” He stated without looking at her.

She risked walking closer, surprised to feel her pulse racing, inexplicably nervous. “Don’t blame yourself,” she said.

He didn’t answer, so she continued. “It’s not even close to the same thing, but, recently, someone left me too.” The lies came easier these days, second nature, telling the truth was almost impossible.

“Did he give you a reason?”

She nodded and smiled slightly. “He said he didn’t know me, hated that I couldn’t tell him anything about an entire part of my life. Actually accused me of having an affair....he just couldn’t understand.”

He looked up at her then, putting down his pen, pushing back his chair.

“Teri didn’t exactly give me a reason, but she didn’t have to, I left her long before she asked me to leave.” He whispered, half to himself.

Like crossing a line, she passed the edge of the desk and turned the corner.

He stood up quickly and violently kicked the chair away, it went a few feet before spinning and stopping.

As if to steady himself, he put one hand flat against the desk.

His breathing sounded slightly rough to her, and she was surprised to find her mouth dry.

I’m not timid, I’m not afraid, she thought, planning out her next move.

Still, the woman who had been living a lie for years felt slightly nervous as she reached out her hand to touch his back. Because, she knew, that she and not her alter-ego had fallen for this man, and she, the woman who was stuck behind the layers of duplicity and blood would be the one who would be hurt if anything went wrong.

But he’d already turned around and easily caught her hand in mid-air.

“Neither of us have to be alone,” she whispered, her free hand sliding up his left arm.

She smiled and ran her fingers through his hair and over his ear.

“Nina,” he said, and pulled her towards him, her hand momentarily trapped between their bodies.

She kissed him first, and pulled back slightly to see his reaction. He looked depressed but willing.

His hand was on the back of her head, she felt his quickened pulse against her chest.

“I knew you’d kiss like that,“ he said.

There was nothing timid in the way he kissed her back, meeting her intensity and need. He let go of her hand, as if he just remembered that was what his other hand was doing and she immediately began unbuttoning his shirt.

The edge of the glass desk bit into her flesh through her clothes, his now free hand was on her waist and traveling lower.

The cameras.

Shit. The cameras.

She turned them around and pushed back, panting slightly.

“Did you need anything else?“ She tried to ask calmly.

He looked at her for a few seconds, his shirt was half unbuttoned and confused didn’t quite explain his reaction.

She stepped back and walked to the other side of the desk, hoping he remembered the constant office surveillance and the security guards downstairs.

“No, I think we’re done for tonight.” He said, quickly trying to re-button his shirt and look around at the cameras without actually looking.

“If you need anything, you know where to reach me.” She said, feeling flushed and wanting nothing more than to continue.

The way he looked at her, she knew he felt the same way.

That was a number of hours earlier. And now from her point of view was not good. Someone had entered the room.

They wanted to know if everything was okay.

She lied and said things were perfect. They left quickly without questioning her further.

They were going to be angry about this new snag.

Her other cell phone rang, she looked at the caller ID and answered cautiously.

“I don’t think the cameras saw us.”

“I guess not.”

“Do you want to get a drink tomorrow night?”

“Yeah, that would be nice. Listen, I have long distance on the other line so I have to go. Why don’t you stop by tomorrow night? No pressure.”

“Okay, I will.”

He’d hung up by the time she thought of the next words to say.

Her phone rang again, and she picked it up.

“I can’t sleep, would it be okay if I came over now?”

“Yes, of course it would.”

“I’ll be there in a half hour.”

She hung up and logged off, shutting down the computer and putting it and the other cell phone back in their hiding places.

“I can do this,” she told herself out loud. “They won’t find out.”

Her actions were dangerous, she knew it, knew that operatives had vanished for lesser reasons, but for the first time in years her cunning mind was no longer in control.

“I’ll keep this a secret,” she told the mirror. “They won’t hurt me over this.”

It was really only a matter of time before they discovered this new twist. The only question was how they would use it to their advantage.

She tried not to think about it as she slipped off her pajamas and stepped into the shower. After all, she only had 25 minutes and she didn’t want to keep Jack waiting.